I want to discuss a topic I've been grappling with—understanding the difference between being respected and being liked. As a self-described peacemaker, I've struggled with confrontation and holding people accountable. But through my experiences, I've learned valuable lessons that I'd like to share with you.
In the past, I used to prioritize being liked above everything else. As a peacemaker, I would avoid conflicts at all costs, even if it meant compromising my own boundaries. This behavior not only affected my personal life but also had a detrimental impact on my professional life as an entrepreneur.
For instance, I found it challenging to confront employees when they made mistakes or address issues that arose. Instead, I focused on giving positive feedback rather than providing constructive criticism. I needed to learn how to strike a balance and effectively communicate with my team.
Through trial and error, I've discovered that different individuals respond differently to feedback. Some prefer direct, to-the-point advice, while others prefer a tactful approach. Recognizing these differences has enabled me to adapt my communication style accordingly. To offer constructive feedback, I now frame it as "homework," emphasizing that we are all continuously learning and growing.
I also employ the "sandwich method," where I start with a compliment, provide suggestions for improvement, and end on a positive note. This approach has allowed me to address issues effectively while maintaining a supportive and encouraging environment.
Accountability is a crucial aspect of any business, and as an entrepreneur, I had to learn how to hold my team accountable. Initially, I felt uncomfortable setting specific goals or expectations because I feared the potential consequences of addressing underperformance.
However, I realized that achieving accountability, growth, and improvement would be easier. I implemented key performance indicators (KPIs) to overcome this challenge and created a culture that values accountability. Additionally, I had to develop the courage to let go of employees who needed to fit the company's vision and goals.
Implementing change within an organization can be met with resistance from team members. Initially, I would stress over this resistance, but now I understand that change is natural and not everyone will immediately embrace it.
Trusting my instincts and having confidence in the decisions I make has become crucial. I remind myself that while not everyone may agree with the changes, as a leader, I need to prioritize what is best for the company and the team's growth. By separating emotions from business decisions, I can make rational choices that benefit everyone involved.
Throughout my journey, I have learned to value respect over likability without dismissing the importance of being liked. It is essential to prioritize the health and success of my business over seeking constant validation.
Holding my ground and making difficult decisions, such as imposing new processes or addressing underperformance, has become a part of my growth as an entrepreneur. Although it is not always easy, I have found peace in focusing on my values and doing what is right for the overall well-being of my business.
In conclusion, my journey as a female e-commerce entrepreneur has been one of self-discovery and growth. Understanding the difference between being respected and being liked has allowed me to navigate the challenges of leadership more effectively. While striving for respect, I have also come to accept that not everyone will like every decision.